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The year is coming to an end yet agn.
Never really felt like a year has gone by.
Just felt like it was too fast.
Perhaps the little time spent being happy;
Triggered that very feeling.
Most of the time spent was lamenting my life.



Let’s recap on a monthly basis on what happened this year.

RECAP of the year 2008:

JANUARY…


* Exactly @ 12 am(New Year’s) ; had my first alcohol.
* Spent this new year out.(first time too)
* Spent it with special friends of mine(: [namely: lala besty,theo,tobias,thurs & Ashley)
* Drank a lot but managed not to get drunk ; thanks to those idiot who pissed theo off…





* My 19th bday was a blast(:
* HRC is a great venue 4 teen’s bday celebration(:
* The waiters/waitresses were really spontaneous & cool.
* Had to do tt “FAKE” bj thingy on tt bartable,which totally freaks me out.lols.


January went by real great(: terrific moments when things
Felt so right & at ease. Couldn’t ask for more(:
A great start for the year 12008:D





FEBRUARY:



* The month of cupid being stupid.(valentine’s day)
* Was hoping for that kookoo to ask me.lols.
* Really love him since last year say oct?somewhere there.lols..
MARCH:




* Moments spent with loved ones will always be cherish all my life.
* There were loads of great moments shared/
* Some very memorable while some I wish to forget(:
* The quote suits the month(:



APRIL:




* Start working @ KWE as admin clerk.
* Job was fun;met new friend (: Agnes,Sab,etc)
* Met a horrible creature there too.(CAROL CHONG!)
* She’s a “Malaysian supervisor!” how annoying she can be.gosh.
That woman is a real workaholic.never seen one like that ever in my life.





MAY:



* Been clubbing a lot(:
* Made new friends along the way(namely; Jeremie,Kevin dear)
* Still have my besty by my side(:
The greatest gift GOD can ever get me was them:PILAR & MELLIE(
* Been partying like a wild girl.lols.
* Fagging a lot too…
* Fashion sense gradually starts to be improving(:thank god.






JUNE:







JULY:




* Besty loves had her tongue pierced(:
Cool stuffs.lols..
* XCraft does gr8 stuffs(: (recommendations if u wanna do any piercing;))
* Been spending lotsa tyme with besty(: & working ot(:
* She’s not in one of her best moments ryte now.sighs.poor darling.






AUGUST:




* Went for Songs of The Seas(:
It was great experience. The only sad part was it’s only 15 mins of less?
Very short the timing):
* Went there with Theo,Tobs & Lala Besty(: @ sentosa there.lols.nice.
* I think the same month we went for the HSM thingy or was it during JUNE.
Can’t really recall. But tt too was a tremendously fun tyme of my life.lols.
It was nice(: very memorable 1st tyme(:






SEPTEMBER:




* My Bestie’s 19th bday(:
* Had so much fun.lols.it’s just really lots of memories that happened
Some of which I choose not to share(: only those there knew..
Cherish-able moments are tattoo-ed in my heart for life.
Never will it disappear.



OCTOBER:





* Celebrated his 20th bday.
For the 1st tyme I actually planned someone’s bday out,
Used my own money & stuffs.lols.
Lyk really went ALL out for someone.lols.1st tyme.

* He had his beef steak specially made by Thurs (:
That chef(: can’t do w/o lala too..she helped a lot.

* The cake was magnificent!gorgeous.lols.i love it(:
* After that went out to clubb..as usual tantrics.






* Had my tongue pierced too(:
@ XCraft.lols.i teared a fair bit.cos of tt fear.lols.
The only tyme it hurts was when that clipper clip your tongue,
Other than tt it’s fine.i absolutely <3>

NOVEMBER:

* The year is just not ending very well.
* I fought with him. He’s caught in a love triangle.
Which I don’t wish to be a part of. I chose to walk away/
Which I tought would be e wise choice but I was wrong.sighs.
It seemed I made it worst. All I wanna see is people to be happy.
I’ll be fyne(: god has made me grow with strength by putting me to this test(:
There’s nth I cant do when it’s Him who test it for I believe in this
:If He can put you to this test;He’ll pull you thru it.
& also God will put you thru a test that’s up to your capabilities(:
And these test helps me get a step closer to the ryte one(:

* I fought a lot with besty tooo…esp near December):
Sad cos she’s the last on my list to be on combat with.hurhur…
But well as I said all these test helps to strengthens it all.
It sure made my friendship with her stronger.
And we realized tt things as impt as our friendship shldn’t be taken lytely.
For u may never know which direction storm is coming from):
But still I’m glad things got better somewhat.
Lil misunderstandings can be VERY hazardous.esp to rs.





DECEMBER:









* Year-end really isn’t going well for my rs with
Besty & him. Really terrible):
Horrible & disastrous ending to this year):
Squabbles after squabbles. Ongoing fytes.sighs..
Perfectly nothing seems to go smoothly..

* Totally out of my league to continue fytes.

* It just seems so wrong. Life has more to offer than this.

* Oh and I forgot to mention one impt thing! We karaoke-ed a LOT!
Literally a LOT~~~ but it was great fun(: sang my hearts out.lols.with gack.
On the majority basis. & jer too.

* And I’m over LOVE for now somewhat. Hahas. You really ought
to wait for all these to come naturally than to nurture it with your all. Cos I feel
that it’s not gonna be worth anything if you’re not sincere. But thank god,He gave me
wisdom & a heart tt loves sincerely(: so even if my love given didn’t harbour any reaps,I have no regrets(: I’ve not fought a losing battle,proud to say I tried my best.
But to some my best wasn’t enough.lols..as I always say my Mr Right is somewhere out there lost in the woods. He took the wrong turn & now looking for his way back to the path that will lead him str8 to my heart(: Lols.patience is virtue (:


* Ouhs and I found two new friends(: they’re gr8 companian.
One is a hidden friend.lols.the other one is his bestfriend(:
Thurs & Naufal.lols.they’re real jokerz.lols.
Laughter trails their footsteps. Never failed to put a smile on my face.
Nor to spread my laughter across the room. Lil siblings of mine tt weren’t
Born together.lols. glad god let my path cross theirs.
Though this rs is rather new but it has already gone thru a fair bit of ups & down.lols. due to misunderstanding tt has been cleared.thank god.
Cos life would be a lil different w/o them(:


Ending things off with a lil poem I found(:


With that I end of my year.

May God grant me a better year (2009)!
Forgive me for all tt I’ve sinned.
Give me a bryter year ahead dear God..
A life that I’ll live never to regret.
Sth I can fall back upon one day smiling(:

Sunday, December 28, 2008

MIZunderstood!

sick of tt.
if u think i'm
hypocritical!
one advice:don't bother talking to me.
as i said i'm CONTENTED to
have 2 bestfriends in this whole wide world.
pilar & mellie = sufficient necessity for me to live in e
e name of friendship!they're e reason tt word exist!
it's not easy to break us up.
i thank god for that,for this beautiful friendship!
nth else matters tt very much compared to tt.
it stands above all.after my family commitments.

things changes in e blink of an eye.
nth is ever constant.
i'm a girl filled with flaws.
the insecurities tt consumes within,
tt fear of being left alone.
tt inability to live in darkness;both emotionally & literal term.
love is just part of a life;not your life.
what we once tot was a fairytale could be a lifestory(:
happy endings do exists to those
who practices this phrase:patience is virtue!

Monday, December 22, 2008

5 things i accomplished this year:

1. incomplete heart!
2. broken friendships!
3. disappointments.utter disappointments.
4. no improvements.
5.dejectful year-end but it was a lovely start:(


sighs,wondering if my friends will
understand if i were to mia for this end
of year.i just lost tt chirpy touch.
all of me is fake for now.
i am just lost;in this world of deceptions.
all of my perspective of life as it is
had gone down the drain.
i tried my best to coax myself with all
the positivity of this world can give.
but it all came down to one thing:NEGATIVITY!
i really lost it:(
i just need tyme alone.to think.to let go sincerely.
i'm sincerely sorry to whoever i may hurt.
intentionally or vice versa.
i just wish to be indulged in serenity for this year-end.
i truly need it.i just wish to be by myself.
i wanna go out to "celebrate" this new year by myself.
i know i have gr8 friends who will always be there.
but i guess i need myself to be back on par with life as it is.
before i start to mingle again.
please don't start hating me for this tyme for myself.



10 apologies:
1.sorry if i stopped being a friend
-it's temporary;i promise!

2.sorry if i don't reply.
-whichever;your texts,your calls.etc.

3.sorry if i hurt your feelings.
-in whatever way;intentionally or vice versa.

4.sorry if i get bitchy.
-to err is human.

5.sorry if i stop being me.
-every human change.

6.sorry if i NEVER will reply u anymore.
-shows that i've moved on from u.

7.sorry if i start being fussy.
-once in awhile;i deserve e best.

8.sorry if i break down & cry.
-i'm not being emo;just being humanly sane.

9.sorry if i made any of you lose trust in me.
-it's sth impt i learnt;trust is to be gained.but it
solely up to indv.if i'm worth it.keep me.if i'm not.go!

10.sorry if i stop showing care & affection;LOVE.
-cos LOVE do not exist in my life for now.i dun wish to show it.
tt don't mean i dun cre.just prefer to kp it in.let it creep
within me.for me only to know.& e rest nvr to find out!

Saturday, December 06, 2008

Karma seemed the Cruel-est thing right now.
i believe in angel.
things will constantly change.
nth remains e same.
& i'm tt broken angel.

love is never lasting.
lust is e major doom.
what seemed sky high,
fell before it cld bloom.

Beauty don't seem to linger.
For it will fade away.
To be able to foresee it,
Is the real beauty hidden.

Trusting someone with your all.
Is like giving your heart away.
And believing in e fact,
For them never to throw it away.

Loving someone may hurt badly.
But letting them go will cost more.
Being a fool over & over agn sadly,
Never could you ever stop one's adore.

When ones' love can't be reciprocated,
That pinch is deep and painstaking.
To be involved in such situation made complicated,
Just can never stop your hurting.

Love is filled with abuses.
How can life turn out to be so ironic
Esp so they give such excuses,
That they believe in being platonic.

With their reasons and whims
That never seem to budge one bit.
The same excuse he gave to you,
Was the same one tt he got hit.

Thursday, December 04, 2008

from me to you:
I promise you
I'm always there
When your heart is filled with sorrow
And despair I'll carry you
When you need a friend
You'll find my footprints in the sand

DON'T SPEAK! ;; specially dedicated to you.
You and me
We used to be together
Everyday together always
I really feel
That I'm losing my best friend
I can't believe
This could be the end
It looks as though you're letting go
And if it's real
Well I don't want to know
Don't speak I know just what you're saying
So please stop explaining
Don't tell me cause it hurts
Don't speak I know what you're thinking
I don't need your reasons
Don't tell me cause it hurts
Our memories
Well, they can be inviting
But some are altogether
Mighty frightening
As we die, both you and I
With my head in my hands >I sit and cry
It's all ending I gotta stop pretending who we are...
You and me I can see us dying...are we?
P.S:It's all dedicated specially to the only soldier boy tt matters most in my life.

A friend is what u see.but e love tt fills my eyes;you're blinded to.
I knew your dreams
Because we used to talk
For hours at a time.

I knew your friendship
Because you were always there
When I needed your comfort.

I knew your pain
Because you trusted me enough
To share your past with me.

I knew your fears
Because you helped me
To see that mine were the same.

I knew what was important to you
Because you were always
So honest with me.

I knew your goals
Because I felt the enthusiasm
In your words when you talked of them.

I knew your guidance
Because you patiently explained
The things I didn't understand.

I knew your heart
Because I saw right into it
And felt it a part of my own.

I knew your honor
Because you let me go
When I fell in love with you.

And I knew your love
Because you wouldn't let me dream of us together.



Look a lil closer and e truth you seek shall reveal.
You walked into my Life,
when my world was dark and cold,
you held out your arms,
and my heart and soul you did hold.

You promised you would never leave,
that you would always be there,
I never knew that I meant so much,
that my heart was worth enough to care.

You showed me so many things,
I started to dream of you every night,
you melted the coldness in my heart,
with the warmth of your light.

I ended up falling for you,
how could I not -
you're an Angel in disguise,
and every touch from you makes my soul hot.

But then you told me it's not the same.
for you only think of me as a friend,
I cannot understand this,
the wrong messages you did send.

I never knew you spent so much on your friend,
and touched them like a lover's grind,
I never knew you held your friends' hand
and caressed them when noone sees.

I am so far,
I cannot turn back now,
you are My Best friend,
so what do I do now.

I don't know much,
except here I am again in
Love with a man who only wants to be my friend.
I'm not sure if this is wrong,
then again I don't know what's right,

I will Love You Anyways, even if its a lonely fight.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

you're still the one...

god knows how long it'll take
me to move on from this love.
from this cloudy moments.
to let him go with an open heart.
to let him love freely.
cos he wasn't mine to start with.
maybe he just wasn't meant for me.
come on nora.you're strong.
you can go on fine.force yourself okay


i'll let u go;if tts what u want me to do(:
i wish u all e best boyy..
soldier boy;all e beautiful memories we shared.
i'll let it be tattooed deep in my heart.